You don’t understand. You wont, and nobody will. For once, I am okay with it.
Its like everything that I have been through has leaded me to this perfect little niche.
I don’t think there is something wrong by feeling like I don’t want to deal with the world. I talk, quite a lot and I laugh, quite loud. Its just lately I feel more comfortable being around someone that I know really well, and I am satisfied with it. I don’t need hundreds to make me happy, is what I’m saying.
Someone I adore once said: I am an introvert, but in order to survive I’m an extrovert. I guess I am like that too. I think I have been through quite a lot, that I don’t have the interest to gain the extra layer of the so-called happiness.
I am fine being alone, I am fine with my inner circle, I am fine with my family and I am fine with my friends. For once, this is enough. For once, I wish for things to stay. For once, I am content with life, the way it is, with its imperfections and obscurities, that I do not wish for something extra anymore.
I have enough, and I am not greedy to beg for more. I am fine being in the corner of my room, snuggled with my Baymax under the blanket on Saturday night, as long as I am happy. I am content with having arms to come to when I’m down. I am content with a handful of friend whose shoulders are there when I cry, rather than fifties who are ready only when napkins and balloons are there.
I think I have came to the point where being happy with simplicity is enough. And I would love to have my perfect little life for a long time.